NO STRINGS ATTACHED

title: NO STRINGS ATTACHED
year: 2011
cast: Ashton Kutcher, Natalie Portman
rating: **

Remember when the Vietnam drama PLATOON came out and there was FULL METAL JACKET to counter it? Or ARMAGEDDON dealing with a giant Earthbound meteor shadowed by DEEP IMPACT? While the subject of friends having sex without consequence isn't quite in the same league as battles and asteroids, there's a lot to be said for this Cinema Siamese Twin syndrome. Like the Justin Timberlake/Mila Kunis FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, a movie that not only adheres to the plotline but is named after it, NO STRINGS ATTACHED takes a much different approach. Not really about two people trying to remain friends through random sexual encounters, this deals with a troubled girl who can't commit and the sappy dude who wants what he can't have. Directed by comedy veteran Ivan Reitman, the only resemblance to his past work is that it begins at summer camp. But this ain't no MEATBALLS, GHOSTBUSTERS, or even KINDERGARTEN COP for that matter. The plot meanders from one dull situation to the next, resulting in an abundance of navel-gazing by a sulky Kutcher who, the son of a famous actor, wants to make a name for himself scriptwriting a show that makes GLEE seem creative. Natalie Portman tries her best but has so many quirks, she's not a person to root for. Making a handsome millionaire a more relatable character. Although the first half has potential... the duo's chemistry isn't all bad... the deeper Kutcher falls in love, the worse things get for himself and the audience.